A little over a year...

It has been a little over a year....

...since we said goodbye.

...since I last saw your beautiful(handsome) face.

...since I heard you laugh.

...since I saw you smile.

It has been a little over a year....

...and I still can't sing "Blessed Be Your Name" without weeping. "You give and take away" isn't so easy to sing after losing you.

...and memories of you are still so fresh in my mind.

...and I can still remember how you liked to be held.

...and I miss you more than ever.

...and I love you more and more every day. My heart still swells with love for you.

It has been a little over a year....

...but my life won't seem complete even when 5, 10, 20 years have passed.

...and I still face the holidays with a little bit of dread because I know it'll be another holiday without you.

...and your little brother has joined us. You would have loved him. We love him just as we love you, but our hearts ache to have both of our boys together. Collen will miss you, too, as he gets older and learns more and more about his big brother....and that breaks our hearts as well.

It has been a little over a year....

It's hard to believe.



  1. and now I'm crying. But that is good, because I want you to know we miss Ayden, too. His picture remains on our fridge. Jonah talks to him every day. Your little one is not forgotten, Lindsay. Even though I may not mention him every day, I don't go through a day without thinking about him, about you guys, and about what I learned from Ayden. Praying for a sweet holiday season.

  2. So bittersweet...been a long week in my town, a friend's grandbaby died on Sunday from a clot in the embilical cord, she was due in a few weeks, a little girl who was to join her big brother(6 yrs. old)heartbreaking to say the least...always in my thoughts and prayers, how proud Ayden must be to come from such an beautiful family! May this be a wonderful holiday season for you and yours!

  3. :'( our lives will never be the same. our happiest moments will always be twinged with pain. it doesn't seem right that someone should have to live this pain forever. but i hope that ayden and julius are hanging out together. i know they would be good friends. they seem a lot alike. ((hugs)) :'(

  4. I haven't felt much like blogging lately... it is so hard to celebrate the birth of Jesus, without OUR sons here. I just have to imagine my best christmas ever, and multiply that by 1,000,000 and think.... that is what our sons Christmas is like... and every day in Heaven.

  5. It is hard to believe. Thinking of you hun