I dreamt of you...

...and you were so beautiful.

You were out of that burden of a chair....and you were walking. WALKING! I haven't seen you walk for years....my first memories of you are of you walking, with so much spirit and courage, facing ALS like a warrior.

The night of my dream, I was reliving your death and everything I wished I could have done. You told me you wanted me to be there, and I wasn't. I had a newborn and couldn't be there. I wish I could have hugged you and told you it was all going to be okay. I wish I could have held your hand one more time. I wish I could have seen you pass into glory and triumph over this life and meet our Savior in Heaven.

In my dream, you were walking around as if you were looking for someone. I found you and hugged you so hard! You sat in my lap (haha...you would have found that humorous) and told me how scared you were, and I just kept telling you everything was okay. That we were all okay. We cried together and I told you everything I wish I could have done for you, and you told me it was okay. I miss you, my sister. I miss you, my friend. I miss our talks. I miss hearing your voice. I miss feeling your strength by just standing in your presence. Someone was at church the other day in a wheel chair like yours - I did a double take because for a second, I forgot. I was sad for a moment....but I can never stay too sad for too long....because I know where you are - I know you are basking in the glory of the Lord - and I know you are whole. I've never known what it meant to rejoice in death, but Jill....the day you went home....I found the ability to rejoice for you. But it's still hard, and we all still miss you so, so much. Our human hearts hurt because you're missing from our lives, but our souls know we will be with you again.

Love you, Lady. :)