Nothing much to report....

Not much to report here lately. This week NC has been hit by the gross leftovers of a tropical depression. It has been rainy and windy for the past 2 days. Not just your typical rain. Sideways rain. It feels like the onset of a hurricane, but it never gets worse. The bad thing about these types of storms is that they are slooooow. Hurricanes, although they do more damage most of the time, at least come and go pretty quickly.

Roads have been closed and school has been delayed. Poor Gracie hasn't been out of her pen since Tuesday night. I feel so bad looking out the window and knowing she's all curled up in her doghouse trying to keep warm. I'm miserable for her. I wish we could let her out, but then she'd get even more wet and cold, and if she ever got badly sick we would never forgive ourselves.

Our backyard can't keep up, so there are pools of water everywhere. I wish I had taken pictures. We needed the rain, but it's never fun when it comes in this way.

Jeremy was off of work for Veteran's Day, so we enjoyed parts of the day together. Since it was rainy and windy, our satellite was out. So, he spent a lot of time playing xbox, and I caught up on tv shows online. We did venture out in the rain to have lunch with Lauren and then to have dinner with Candi, Curt and their two kids. I haven't had food that good in a long time. We will join the Tuckers for dinner any night....

Today, the rain continued. I had to venture out this morning to pick up more (yes...more) paperwork for being out of work. It's so frustrating. This now means I have to go back to my doctor, again, to get her to fill out the paperwork. I don't like doing that because I feel like such a bother. But, they said Dr. and I guess it looks better if the same one fills it all out, so I will impose yet again. I hope this will be the last round of paperwork. Then, when I go back to work, I'll be filling out more. Endless cycle....

I went to work today just to check on some things. I sure do miss my kids and my co-workers. I am so excited about my classes next semester, but scared at the same time. My first period works out well because they are students I've taught in the past. This means that if I need to take a moment and break down, then I can, and they will 100% understand. It'll start my day off well to know I have their support. I'm not used to having a lot of attention put on me. However, now I show up to school and as soon as one student sees me, I hear 10 other "Mrs. Jones!! Mrs. Jones!!" I find myself wanting to run into the nearest room to hide because it's so strange to be so known. It's nice to know I'm missed and loved. It has helped me to heal a little.

Tomorrow Jeremy's football team goes to their first round of the playoffs. So, I will be journeying back to our hometown to watch their game. Hopefully the rain will have cleared up by then. It's so weird to go back home because it feels so foreign. It used to be home.....but it just isn't the same.

I hope everyone has had a good week. As usual, mine has been up and down. I miss Ayden so much every minute of every day. At some moments, I can think of him and smile. At other moments, I can't catch my breath.

Continuing to just hold on.



  1. I hope the weather clears up for you soon. I'm sure Gracie will be fine, she knows y'all are not far away.

    Thinking of you - Kelley

  2. Saying a prayer this morning for you both. We love you!

  3. You are in my prayers. I think of Ayden everyday, I can't imagine your loss.

  4. Dear Lindsay,

    I was thinking of Ayden yesterday and thinking about a recent post where you talked about how you want people to know his story. Then my mind wandered to my great uncle who died as a 10 year old boy and how nearly 100 years after his birth, his family still remembers his story. His mother certainly never forgot - that's a given. But neither did his sister (my grandmother) who passed his story onto her daughter (my mom) and to me. And I'll pass his story and pictures on to my son. He was only a boy, but he'll never be forgotten.

    Here's the post I wrote about my Uncle Bus a little while back.

    I know it's not at all the same, but I just thought about how your children's children WILL know and remember Ayden because you will continue to tell his story. When compared with eternity, each of our lives is just a flash and what we leave behind is our story and the people who love us to tell that story... too many of those stories are quickly forgotten, even when we live a long life. But Ayden's story is here to stay and in 100 years I know that someone will still be telling the story of the beautiful, perfect Ayden Brooks Jones who was so very loved and who's life and story touched so many lives.

    I hate the ending to Ayden's story, but I love his story. Thinking and praying for you.

    Warm hugs,

  5. I wanted to let you know I've been thinking of you and praying for you everyday. I can't imagine what you are going through and I HATE that you are going through it...NO ONE should have to experience this, but especially people that seem so sweet, faithful, and genuine. My heart breaks for you and wish I could just give you hug. Please know that while "life does go on" I will NEVER forget your story, Ayden, or have touched my life in such a way you will never know and I am in constant awe of how you are even opening your eyes each day. Your constant faith in God is such an inspiration and just keep holding on to that as tight as you can. I hope you are able to enjoy the weekend and I pray that your pain will ease and joy will return to your life soon. (((HUGS)))

  6. Hello Lindsay and Jeremy, As always you are on my mind. It seems good when I can read another update on your feelings and thoughts. I hurt for you so badly. I KNOW the hurt. Tomorrow makes 4 years that William left us. Sometimes, I really think I'm not doing as well now because the shock was there for a long long time, and now, I know without a shadow of a doubt, he's not going to drive up in the driveway EVER. I know you miss Ayden's little mannerisms like I do William.It doesn't matter the age~~~ your child is your child. About work? Whether you stay out 1 month or 12's about YOU. You're not bothering one single person. Paperwork is @#$%^& uncalled for at times but just do what you have to do to look after yourself. Lindsay, just take each day one by one, and cry or laugh when you want to. It's all about you. I want you and Jeremy to continue to take care of one another. I'll be checking on you a little later. Praise God for his steadfast love. Love, gail wheless